More from the Autobiography.....
I lived in that house at 1805 Belle Terrace in Bakersfield California until I was 11 years old. Lots of things happened there. I ate orange sections with my Grandmother at night while we watched Gunsmoke. The police came one night when my Mother and Aunt were fighting and Moma threw a glass of Buttermilk and it got all over the police. I found all kinds of bugs and watched them up close. I had a Manx Cat named Bobbi who responded to you calling it like it was a dog. At one point I had two bantam chickens named Bonnie and Clyde. I saw my Aunt come in the house from a fight bloody. I got whippings with whatever my Grandma could grab at the time. I helped Grandma can vegetables and make chow chow. I went to Castro Lane Elementary School until I got tested and was placed in the “gifted” class in another school.
That house was spotlessly clean as my Grandmother was. We went to church on Sunday morning, Sunday nights and sometimes during the week. Just my Grandma Clara and me. I remember listening to Grandma cry out to God from behind her closed bedroom door, praying for her family that was unsaved or living else where. My Grandmother was strict, firm and hard workingwoman. There was little compromise in her, but she gave me a foundation as a child that I would return to as an adult, and I appreciate the way she raised me even though I NEVER showed it, nor probably never told her.
My mother lived in Grandma’s house from time to time. Occasionally she would live with a man elsewhere and that was fine. Mother was a waitress, she was pretty and men liked her. She didn’t always like herself though. Moma was addicted to pills and was an alcoholic, but her spells of bad and good would fluctuate. She had tried to commit suicide several times, she suffered from depression and seemed to get her greatest feelings of self worth when men were attracted to her, so naturally her break ups were always her worst time. I loved my Mother. She seemed so much more free and fun loving that my Grandmother to a youngster. She worked “graveyard” shift at the restaurant she worked at. She would be up drinking coffee and counting her tips in the morning when I woke up during the times she lived with Grandma, and I would help her stack the money for her to roll in paper rolls.
She gave me all her pennies and I started a bank account. I felt very grown up about that (smile). You know the funny thing is I had my account with Bank of America and that is the bank I use now 3,000 miles from my California upbringing.
When I got close to a hundred dollars, I went looking for a home for my mother and me. I found a small bungalow behind a big house that they wanted $75 a month for in the year 1971. It was perfect and I went to see it by self and let the landlady know I would take it. Right after I got my Grandma to give me my Penny Money.
They allowed me to rent the little place for us and my mother and I were back on our own. I guess she started getting welfare then, but I am really not sure. I do remember the commodities. The canned meat, hard peanut butter and big blocks of cheese. I know her drug addiction and alcoholism progressed rapidly during that time, and I remember sitting up one night with her while she either had DTs or just plain hallucinations from drugs. Poor Moma. Some folks are just not meant to raise children and she was just one of them.
I know she was seeing men, but I don’t remember them at all. I do remember walking into the bathroom one time seeing all the blood and a clothes hanger where she had given herself an abortion. Someone ended up burglarizing that little bungalow and stealing our little black and white TV and a roast we had in the freezer. I believe everyone assumed it was a man that mother had had a relationship with that had done it. We had to move after that, and we were able to rent a small house that sat on the alleyway at 2129 Verde St. I still dream of that house, although I know what in more recent years the house and property was purchased and a new house was built on the property more towards the street while the owner lived in the little house, and eventually the little house was torn down.
Saturday, March 29
Thursday, March 13
Prayer. I pray like God is sitting next to me and I have some stuff to tell Him. I've never done a lot of formal praying. My prayers generally consist of thank God for individual things he has done in my and my families life, praying for folks (forgetting half or more of the ones that need the prayer), and praying to live in His will. I pray lots of times during the day as I think of things. Probably 10 times a day, a lot of which is "thank you Lord" type of thing or praying to have the right things to say to people.
I feel it's important to be more organized with my prayer. Like do a list and pray for folks. Also, my devotions. I saw where the Pastor's wife had written hers down and she had said she wrote down what the Lord said to her in that section of the Word. I like that idea, but if I do it on my own, I don't think I will stick to it.
Anyway...............I am not where I would like to be in these areas, I am okay, but is okay enough....................It probably would be for me alone, but God wants me to bring his Word to other folks, so I need to be in the right place with Him to bring the right Word.
In church last night, I got a kind of a revelation that if I wanted to know what God wanted me to do, I needed to study His word. Now that may not be significant to some folks, but it was a light bulb moment for me! It was like God was say, DUUUUHHH.
Wow...........I talk a lot.................Have a great day...........
I feel it's important to be more organized with my prayer. Like do a list and pray for folks. Also, my devotions. I saw where the Pastor's wife had written hers down and she had said she wrote down what the Lord said to her in that section of the Word. I like that idea, but if I do it on my own, I don't think I will stick to it.
Anyway...............I am not where I would like to be in these areas, I am okay, but is okay enough....................It probably would be for me alone, but God wants me to bring his Word to other folks, so I need to be in the right place with Him to bring the right Word.
In church last night, I got a kind of a revelation that if I wanted to know what God wanted me to do, I needed to study His word. Now that may not be significant to some folks, but it was a light bulb moment for me! It was like God was say, DUUUUHHH.
Wow...........I talk a lot.................Have a great day...........
Monday, March 10
Well, Lee Lee is out of school again today. The lice didn't quite get out, but I have done her hair again, and gotten tons of stuff done today! I got all my school things organized, Praise God! Plus I made folder for all the papers I need to have with me, like my YMCA schedules, stuff I am doing with church, To Do things, etc. Now I have to go deposit a check that my Dad gave Destiny for her Birthday and then transfer the money to Destiny's account, take some quick notes out of the library books I have and get them back to the library, go to the grocery store, get ready for aerobics class. Now that's not counting the 15 page claim for credit on Decision Making that I need to finish or my Autobiography which will probably take forever to do. I have the Women's prayer group at church tonight after aerobics. I wish we could combine the two!!! I do feel more organized though!
Friday, March 7
Sunday, March 2
As I look back now, folks were doing a lot of moving around. I think that may be one of the reasons it was so important to me in my older life to become stable for my children and when I was younger it may have contributed to my restlessness and continued traveling. There are pros and cons to both situations, but I think it is more important to be as stable as possible.
From the time I was about 7 years old until I was 11 is the time I remember best in my childhood. The funny thing is that I only remembered negative aspects of that time until I worked the 12 Steps of a recovery program. I have really realized that was a great time in my life. Granted, there were some negative aspects, but overall life was pretty good.
I lived at 1805 Belle Terrace in Bakersfield California. Our phone number was 805-832-3299. The house was a old farm house, it was nice and we had about a quarter acre of land. You would walk into the front door and the house would be spotless. Straight ahead would be my grandmother’s recliner that she always had. The livingroom would veer to the left with a couch on each side of the room and a coffee table in the middle. One couch belonged to my Grandma Nicholson, my Grandma Clara’s mother. She had lived two house down and had watched me when we had lived in Lindsay. Grandma Nicky had taught me now to cut our paper dolls from newspaper and play “Button Button, who’s got the button”.
The large black and white TV sat at the far left on the center of the wall and it is where we watched shows like Bonanza and Gunsmoke. Directly to the right would be my grandmother’s room. It was a sunny room painted baby blue. Her furniture was white and everything would always be in it’s place. The floor’s were spotless and I recall that Grandmother only had to use a dust mop to get the dust out from under her bed. Today, in my house, with 5 children, I cannot imagine what it would be like to be able to keep my house as clean as my Grandmother kept hers. I strive for it every day, but it is just not possible.
You would have to walk around Grandmother’s chair a little to walk down the short hallway towards the kitchen. Off of the hallway were the restroom to the right and Grandma Nicky’s room to the left. Grandma Nicky always had a box of candy under her bed, and she would let me have a piece from time to time. My favorite was the almond roca. In the hallway ceiling was a large fan called a swamp fan. It sat on the roof and it is what cooled the house in the summer time. I small amount of water was used in a constant stream to keep the filters on all the sides damp and that is what cooled the house. There was swinging type of door before you walked into the kitchen that you could either close when you wanted to cooler primarily the front of the house or open to cool the kitchen as well.
The kitchen was huge! My Grandmother loved it, and she could truly worked magic in that kitchen. It was more than a kitchen of course. It was the gathering place for the family, it was the place we played penny ante poker, it was the room my Aunt Betty through the glass of buttermilk at the police in.
There was two more rooms in that house. Of f to the left was another bedroom and whoever happended to be there at the time stayed in that bedroom. Most of the time I did too, but if we had an extra grown up then I was designated to sleep on the couch. That didn’t seem to bother me at all. It was almost like having my own room.
Through the backdoor was a back porch which had been sealed in and in which my Poppa lived. To the right side was the washing machine, but to the left was Poppa’s room. Never in my life can I remember my Grandmother and Popa sleeping together nor any indication that they ever had sex.
I loved the floor in that room because Poppa had collected carpet scraps of every shape and color and had pieced them together like a giant jigsaw puzzle. It was great! The house had a large yard and two fruit trees in the back yard. An apricot tree and a plum tree. The apricot trees was easy to climb and I spent a lot of hours sitting in the tree.. There was also a large bar b que pit that looked like it was made to bar b que a whole steer in. We never used it, so I used it to play in and to keep my animals in if I had them.
In the far part of the back yard was an old shed and my Popa had a vegitable garden surrounding the shed. There were tomatoes, carrots, okara corn, green beand and ple beans, turnips, nad radishes, and eggplant among others. As I look back on that, I think that was a GREAT garden! What a great job they did on that and how much work must have went into it! I have attempted gardens here at my house but we don’t have a spot that suits it growing right, and it is SO expensive to grow your own veggies!
From the time I was about 7 years old until I was 11 is the time I remember best in my childhood. The funny thing is that I only remembered negative aspects of that time until I worked the 12 Steps of a recovery program. I have really realized that was a great time in my life. Granted, there were some negative aspects, but overall life was pretty good.
I lived at 1805 Belle Terrace in Bakersfield California. Our phone number was 805-832-3299. The house was a old farm house, it was nice and we had about a quarter acre of land. You would walk into the front door and the house would be spotless. Straight ahead would be my grandmother’s recliner that she always had. The livingroom would veer to the left with a couch on each side of the room and a coffee table in the middle. One couch belonged to my Grandma Nicholson, my Grandma Clara’s mother. She had lived two house down and had watched me when we had lived in Lindsay. Grandma Nicky had taught me now to cut our paper dolls from newspaper and play “Button Button, who’s got the button”.
The large black and white TV sat at the far left on the center of the wall and it is where we watched shows like Bonanza and Gunsmoke. Directly to the right would be my grandmother’s room. It was a sunny room painted baby blue. Her furniture was white and everything would always be in it’s place. The floor’s were spotless and I recall that Grandmother only had to use a dust mop to get the dust out from under her bed. Today, in my house, with 5 children, I cannot imagine what it would be like to be able to keep my house as clean as my Grandmother kept hers. I strive for it every day, but it is just not possible.
You would have to walk around Grandmother’s chair a little to walk down the short hallway towards the kitchen. Off of the hallway were the restroom to the right and Grandma Nicky’s room to the left. Grandma Nicky always had a box of candy under her bed, and she would let me have a piece from time to time. My favorite was the almond roca. In the hallway ceiling was a large fan called a swamp fan. It sat on the roof and it is what cooled the house in the summer time. I small amount of water was used in a constant stream to keep the filters on all the sides damp and that is what cooled the house. There was swinging type of door before you walked into the kitchen that you could either close when you wanted to cooler primarily the front of the house or open to cool the kitchen as well.
The kitchen was huge! My Grandmother loved it, and she could truly worked magic in that kitchen. It was more than a kitchen of course. It was the gathering place for the family, it was the place we played penny ante poker, it was the room my Aunt Betty through the glass of buttermilk at the police in.
There was two more rooms in that house. Of f to the left was another bedroom and whoever happended to be there at the time stayed in that bedroom. Most of the time I did too, but if we had an extra grown up then I was designated to sleep on the couch. That didn’t seem to bother me at all. It was almost like having my own room.
Through the backdoor was a back porch which had been sealed in and in which my Poppa lived. To the right side was the washing machine, but to the left was Poppa’s room. Never in my life can I remember my Grandmother and Popa sleeping together nor any indication that they ever had sex.
I loved the floor in that room because Poppa had collected carpet scraps of every shape and color and had pieced them together like a giant jigsaw puzzle. It was great! The house had a large yard and two fruit trees in the back yard. An apricot tree and a plum tree. The apricot trees was easy to climb and I spent a lot of hours sitting in the tree.. There was also a large bar b que pit that looked like it was made to bar b que a whole steer in. We never used it, so I used it to play in and to keep my animals in if I had them.
In the far part of the back yard was an old shed and my Popa had a vegitable garden surrounding the shed. There were tomatoes, carrots, okara corn, green beand and ple beans, turnips, nad radishes, and eggplant among others. As I look back on that, I think that was a GREAT garden! What a great job they did on that and how much work must have went into it! I have attempted gardens here at my house but we don’t have a spot that suits it growing right, and it is SO expensive to grow your own veggies!
Funny the last time I posted was Feb. 11. That was the day the pit bull puppies were born down the street. We bought one today. They are selling them before they are weaned and we have to feed the baby with a bottle. His name is Luke. He has a white head, and a mix brindle and white body. He is just like a new born. Has to be fed all night and day. I guess I will have to take it to work with me tomorrow
We had great time in church last night. The Waynesboro Union Male Chorus was there! They are so good, Pastor's dad is one of them. We didn't make it to church this morning, but will go tonight.
I have been working in the yard all morning. Good exercise!
We had great time in church last night. The Waynesboro Union Male Chorus was there! They are so good, Pastor's dad is one of them. We didn't make it to church this morning, but will go tonight.
I have been working in the yard all morning. Good exercise!
Tuesday, February 11
Destiny has had a high temp for 6 days now, but it totally goes away with Motrin. Still, I am home with her. I have been working on my auto biography a little bit. I don't spell check stuff til the very end, so you will see plenty of misspelling here!
I am still on my health plan and working out, eating right, and all. I don't trust any of the scales. This one at home says I am down to 202 pounds from my starting point of 216. I can't see that dramatic a change, but I do feel better. I am doing aerobics twice a week and walking/jobbing a lot! I just bought some Tae Bo tapes from a lady on Amazon. Think I can handle it? Of course I can!
I am still on my health plan and working out, eating right, and all. I don't trust any of the scales. This one at home says I am down to 202 pounds from my starting point of 216. I can't see that dramatic a change, but I do feel better. I am doing aerobics twice a week and walking/jobbing a lot! I just bought some Tae Bo tapes from a lady on Amazon. Think I can handle it? Of course I can!
Some more of the life story............
I remember the drive to California in my Grandma and Popa's Cadillac. It was the kind that had big fins on the back. The highway wasn't the way it is now, it was really just a road heading west. We stopped one time at an abondoned gas station and resteraunt and my grandmother and I went inside to potty.
There were signs along the way advertising gasoline. They all had big pictures of dinosaurs on them and I have found out later that that was the logo for Sinclair gas.
The next time I saw my mother was in Fresno California. She was married an pregnant. Her husbands name was Dwight Williamson. He was from Oklahoma. In the summer of 1964, my aunt took me with them to Missouri where my Uncle Jack's was from. I guess they wanted to give my mother and her new husband less stress during the time the baby would be born. I had a great time in Missouri. We fished, and I was able to keep the fish I caught in the horse trought. When I got back to California, my mother had given birth to my baby sister, Paula. We all got together and that time, me, my mother and sister, and her father. We all moved to Bakersfield Californa and that is eventually where I was raised.
I started Kindergarten when we lived in the house on L Street. As I grew older we would always refer to those few years as when we were in the house on L Street. It was basically a very happy time. My mother was happy. She wasn't drinking that I know of. She was working what she called the "graveyard shift" as a waitress, and my step dad was working in the oil fields. We were living the typical working class life, it was a happy time most of the time. There were a few issues with my step father that let me know he didn't really care for me as much as he did my younger sister. One time her and I were in the bathtub and I was squirting water on her through the gap in my front teeth. She was crying, but I kept on doing it. Dwight came into the bathroom, when he found out what was going on, he SPIT in my face and ask me how it felt.
There were other subtle things that let me know how he felt and many mornings I would lay in bed listening to the footsteps to determine where I was going to get up or try to stay in bed as long as I could tolerate it. His footsteps were heavy and my mother's were light and fast. One morning I had thought I heard his footsteps and had stayed in bed as long as I could, but when I got up it was my mother and I was so disappointed that I had not gotten up sooner.
The time on L Street ended when my step father stole my little sister in the middle of the night and took her to Oklahoma. My mother and I stood in the middle of each room with a man with us, and she went from room to room telling him how much she wanted for the furnishings. We had gotten a dog named Boots and a Cat named Pussy (I named them after the story "Puss and Boots") while we were there. We left the them both outside the house on L Street and we caught a Greyhound bus to go to Oklahoma and get my little sister.
Dwight had taken Paula to his mother's house in Shawnee and that is where we went. Mother had manipulated the situation to where Dwight thought they were getting back together. Soon, one morning, he went to work and my mother had told me our plan to take Paula and run. We waited until her grandmother went into the bathroom and we picked up our suitcases and Paula, and RAN! We caught another Greyhound bus back to Bakersfield. This would make my 6th cross country trip.
Memories around the next time get a little sketchy. We had a duplex apartment for a while and my older sister Sherry was there with us. Moma had a couple of boyfriends, but things were okay. Then one day Dwight showed up. I still wonder sometimes how he found us this time. Anyway, there was another plan and this one had a man coming to the door and delivaring divorce papers to Dwight, and my Sister Sherry and I running out the back door with Paula. We had a motel room ready at the Royal Palms Motor Inn and we went there and got the room. It was in my mother's boyfriends name, Harry Hake. Eventually mother and Harry showed up, but Dwight had found us soon there after. He managed to get Paula after he knocked Harry Hake through a plate glass door. Things kind of went downhill from there. I think my older sister went back to live with her father and mother drank a lot. On my 6th Birthday, I woke my Mom up and she gave me $5 and told me to go to a friends house and have her mother get me a cake. I was sad. I walked to the drive in resteraunt on the corner and bought myself and handburger with mayonaise only. Then I decided I would walk back to the house and try to wake my mother up again. When I got there my Grandmother and Popa were there. By this time they had moved from Fresno California to Lindsay. They got my clothes and took me with them back to Lindsay.
It turned out to be a great birthday! Grandma made me a cake with three teirs. I missed my mother, but I loved my Grandma and Popa too. At this point, we were blessed because my great grandma Nicky lived two doors down, and I was able to stay with her when my grandma and popa were working. My brother Billy came to live with us some time during that time, but they sold the house eventually, even though Popa had put in a new cedar closet and we moved to Bakersfield. I wonder if it was to keep an eye on Moma.
I remember the drive to California in my Grandma and Popa's Cadillac. It was the kind that had big fins on the back. The highway wasn't the way it is now, it was really just a road heading west. We stopped one time at an abondoned gas station and resteraunt and my grandmother and I went inside to potty.
There were signs along the way advertising gasoline. They all had big pictures of dinosaurs on them and I have found out later that that was the logo for Sinclair gas.
The next time I saw my mother was in Fresno California. She was married an pregnant. Her husbands name was Dwight Williamson. He was from Oklahoma. In the summer of 1964, my aunt took me with them to Missouri where my Uncle Jack's was from. I guess they wanted to give my mother and her new husband less stress during the time the baby would be born. I had a great time in Missouri. We fished, and I was able to keep the fish I caught in the horse trought. When I got back to California, my mother had given birth to my baby sister, Paula. We all got together and that time, me, my mother and sister, and her father. We all moved to Bakersfield Californa and that is eventually where I was raised.
I started Kindergarten when we lived in the house on L Street. As I grew older we would always refer to those few years as when we were in the house on L Street. It was basically a very happy time. My mother was happy. She wasn't drinking that I know of. She was working what she called the "graveyard shift" as a waitress, and my step dad was working in the oil fields. We were living the typical working class life, it was a happy time most of the time. There were a few issues with my step father that let me know he didn't really care for me as much as he did my younger sister. One time her and I were in the bathtub and I was squirting water on her through the gap in my front teeth. She was crying, but I kept on doing it. Dwight came into the bathroom, when he found out what was going on, he SPIT in my face and ask me how it felt.
There were other subtle things that let me know how he felt and many mornings I would lay in bed listening to the footsteps to determine where I was going to get up or try to stay in bed as long as I could tolerate it. His footsteps were heavy and my mother's were light and fast. One morning I had thought I heard his footsteps and had stayed in bed as long as I could, but when I got up it was my mother and I was so disappointed that I had not gotten up sooner.
The time on L Street ended when my step father stole my little sister in the middle of the night and took her to Oklahoma. My mother and I stood in the middle of each room with a man with us, and she went from room to room telling him how much she wanted for the furnishings. We had gotten a dog named Boots and a Cat named Pussy (I named them after the story "Puss and Boots") while we were there. We left the them both outside the house on L Street and we caught a Greyhound bus to go to Oklahoma and get my little sister.
Dwight had taken Paula to his mother's house in Shawnee and that is where we went. Mother had manipulated the situation to where Dwight thought they were getting back together. Soon, one morning, he went to work and my mother had told me our plan to take Paula and run. We waited until her grandmother went into the bathroom and we picked up our suitcases and Paula, and RAN! We caught another Greyhound bus back to Bakersfield. This would make my 6th cross country trip.
Memories around the next time get a little sketchy. We had a duplex apartment for a while and my older sister Sherry was there with us. Moma had a couple of boyfriends, but things were okay. Then one day Dwight showed up. I still wonder sometimes how he found us this time. Anyway, there was another plan and this one had a man coming to the door and delivaring divorce papers to Dwight, and my Sister Sherry and I running out the back door with Paula. We had a motel room ready at the Royal Palms Motor Inn and we went there and got the room. It was in my mother's boyfriends name, Harry Hake. Eventually mother and Harry showed up, but Dwight had found us soon there after. He managed to get Paula after he knocked Harry Hake through a plate glass door. Things kind of went downhill from there. I think my older sister went back to live with her father and mother drank a lot. On my 6th Birthday, I woke my Mom up and she gave me $5 and told me to go to a friends house and have her mother get me a cake. I was sad. I walked to the drive in resteraunt on the corner and bought myself and handburger with mayonaise only. Then I decided I would walk back to the house and try to wake my mother up again. When I got there my Grandmother and Popa were there. By this time they had moved from Fresno California to Lindsay. They got my clothes and took me with them back to Lindsay.
It turned out to be a great birthday! Grandma made me a cake with three teirs. I missed my mother, but I loved my Grandma and Popa too. At this point, we were blessed because my great grandma Nicky lived two doors down, and I was able to stay with her when my grandma and popa were working. My brother Billy came to live with us some time during that time, but they sold the house eventually, even though Popa had put in a new cedar closet and we moved to Bakersfield. I wonder if it was to keep an eye on Moma.
Friday, February 7
Monday, February 3
"A few scars, a little aging of the skin, all traced with beautiful
memories and perhaps not so great moments in nlife. Our bodies are
gifts! You'd be amazed at how you can change it from bad to good just
as you can from good to bad. If only it were as easy! Stay
positive, you never know til you get there!"
That is a quote from the "leader" in a fitness group I belong to now on Yahoo. It's the only group I really have time for lately. Did I tell you I am trying to get more healthy and LOSE weight?
I have been eating like a hog ever since I as on my Hep C treatment, and I just can't go on like this. I am up to 215 pounds. I weighed 170 when I met my husband and got down to 150 soon thereafter. I have been steadily gaining weigh for about the last year and a half!
I keep record of what I eat and what activities I have on Fit Day, like I mentioned before. I like the group in Yahoo. It's called FitnessExchange!
I am up for comments and advice now...................
memories and perhaps not so great moments in nlife. Our bodies are
gifts! You'd be amazed at how you can change it from bad to good just
as you can from good to bad. If only it were as easy! Stay
positive, you never know til you get there!"
That is a quote from the "leader" in a fitness group I belong to now on Yahoo. It's the only group I really have time for lately. Did I tell you I am trying to get more healthy and LOSE weight?
I have been eating like a hog ever since I as on my Hep C treatment, and I just can't go on like this. I am up to 215 pounds. I weighed 170 when I met my husband and got down to 150 soon thereafter. I have been steadily gaining weigh for about the last year and a half!
I keep record of what I eat and what activities I have on Fit Day, like I mentioned before. I like the group in Yahoo. It's called FitnessExchange!
I am up for comments and advice now...................
Thursday, January 30
A friend of mine does the Addiction and Recovery Ministry at this church. First Baptist Church of College Hill - Tampa, Florida
Thursday, January 23
Wednesday, January 22
Monday, January 20
Sunday, January 19
Autobiography
I have to do one for a class I am taking, and so I will put parts here.
My first memory was of riding a tricylce around a house that had a lot of tombstones in front of it. Did I know they were tombstones then? I'm not sure, but I can see them now sitting there in the front yard. My tricycle was read and I could ride it around the side walk that went around the house very fast, but I had to be quiet because there were people in the front room of the house and they were very sad. I mustn't shout or laugh loudly. My aunt walked me through the front of the house past the people, some of whom were crying, back to back where the bedrooms were. We were going to take a nap, but we would ride our bicycles first by holding our legs in the air and peddling as fast as we could for as long as we could. Then we would take our nap. This memory is of a time I lived in an area of Oklahoma with my Grandmother's Brother and his Wife. The name I remember was Aunt Nell and Uncle Granvil. They had a business selling headstones.
I was born in 1960 to Stanley and Patsy Dean Snyder. My father was a Marine stationed in San Diego, California. He was a handsome young man from Kentucky and he met my mother in a bar. She was wearing pink. My mother had been married before and had given birth to two children, a girl Sherry who was born with problems in her hips, and a boy Billy. She divorced her first husband while he was in prison. Right before she married my father. It is my understanding that she had two other children (boys) in between my Brother Billy and me, but not a lot of people know about that. My mother told me, but she never told my father and my older sister doesn't seem to know much about it either. My mother told me they had black hair and were adopted by a preacher.
My mother and father's relationship was a turbulent one. I have heard different things from different people over the years, and in this paper I will attempt to be as honest as possible. I will change the facts as needed and based on who I give to read this. I would never let my father know that I would ever put down on paper some of the things I plan to share here. There are other things, I would not want my husband or children to know, but I am writing this for an anonymus person. Who are you? I don't know, but I know that there are a lot of things that need to go down here, and it ALL is going to go down here. Will I be able to finish this paper for my Portfolio class that I am going to write it for? Maybe not. Maybe after writing today, I will stop and do an outline, write the basics for the class and then continue on for myself. I will put in on my web log. Most of it. Not that parts that can affect anyone living, or hurt someone's feelings. That is not the reason for this. The reason is that it needs to be documented. The why's and the where's of who I am. So I will continue.............
I have to do one for a class I am taking, and so I will put parts here.
My first memory was of riding a tricylce around a house that had a lot of tombstones in front of it. Did I know they were tombstones then? I'm not sure, but I can see them now sitting there in the front yard. My tricycle was read and I could ride it around the side walk that went around the house very fast, but I had to be quiet because there were people in the front room of the house and they were very sad. I mustn't shout or laugh loudly. My aunt walked me through the front of the house past the people, some of whom were crying, back to back where the bedrooms were. We were going to take a nap, but we would ride our bicycles first by holding our legs in the air and peddling as fast as we could for as long as we could. Then we would take our nap. This memory is of a time I lived in an area of Oklahoma with my Grandmother's Brother and his Wife. The name I remember was Aunt Nell and Uncle Granvil. They had a business selling headstones.
I was born in 1960 to Stanley and Patsy Dean Snyder. My father was a Marine stationed in San Diego, California. He was a handsome young man from Kentucky and he met my mother in a bar. She was wearing pink. My mother had been married before and had given birth to two children, a girl Sherry who was born with problems in her hips, and a boy Billy. She divorced her first husband while he was in prison. Right before she married my father. It is my understanding that she had two other children (boys) in between my Brother Billy and me, but not a lot of people know about that. My mother told me, but she never told my father and my older sister doesn't seem to know much about it either. My mother told me they had black hair and were adopted by a preacher.
My mother and father's relationship was a turbulent one. I have heard different things from different people over the years, and in this paper I will attempt to be as honest as possible. I will change the facts as needed and based on who I give to read this. I would never let my father know that I would ever put down on paper some of the things I plan to share here. There are other things, I would not want my husband or children to know, but I am writing this for an anonymus person. Who are you? I don't know, but I know that there are a lot of things that need to go down here, and it ALL is going to go down here. Will I be able to finish this paper for my Portfolio class that I am going to write it for? Maybe not. Maybe after writing today, I will stop and do an outline, write the basics for the class and then continue on for myself. I will put in on my web log. Most of it. Not that parts that can affect anyone living, or hurt someone's feelings. That is not the reason for this. The reason is that it needs to be documented. The why's and the where's of who I am. So I will continue.............
Tuesday, January 14
People are often unreasonable, irrational, and self-centered;
Forgive them anyway.
If you are kind, people may accuse you of selfish, ulterior motives;
Be kind anyway.
If you are successful, you will win some unfaithful friends and some genuine enemies;
Succeed anyway.
If you are honest and sincere people may deceive you;
Be honest and sincere anyway.
What you spend years creating others could destroy overnight;
Create anyway.
If you find serenity and happiness, some may be jealous;
Be happy anyway.
The good you do today, will often be forgotten.
Do good anyway.
Give the best you have, and it may never be enough;
Give your best anyway.
In the final analysis, it is between you and God;
It was never between you and them anyway.
-Mother Teresa
Forgive them anyway.
If you are kind, people may accuse you of selfish, ulterior motives;
Be kind anyway.
If you are successful, you will win some unfaithful friends and some genuine enemies;
Succeed anyway.
If you are honest and sincere people may deceive you;
Be honest and sincere anyway.
What you spend years creating others could destroy overnight;
Create anyway.
If you find serenity and happiness, some may be jealous;
Be happy anyway.
The good you do today, will often be forgotten.
Do good anyway.
Give the best you have, and it may never be enough;
Give your best anyway.
In the final analysis, it is between you and God;
It was never between you and them anyway.
-Mother Teresa
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